Tuesday, August 2, 2011

There's no sexy name for it or anything. We just call it Tuesday

Big ups to the ICE agent I took that quote from. How's the northern border treating you?! It's been too long. Let's catch up and play a round of golf.

There's not a lot to say about today. Today is Tuesday. Today I spent a lot of time listening to other people talk, which forced me to concentrate on the words coming out of their mouths rather than my own thoughts. As far as blogging, it kinda took the wind out of my sails.

However, I have two items that are sure to fascinate. First, the most important thing I did at work today was find this video clip of Cheri Oteri as Adele the Office Slut. Go watch it, now. Then let's talk about it, and reenact it together. Also know that interesting things appear when you google any phrase that includes "office slut," including an adorable picture of white baby tigers.

Oh I go both ways baby! Sure, is that what you're talkin about? Because this is what I'm talkin about! Oh yeah we could make a sandwich, with us as the bun and you as the hot dog! And by hot dog, I mean that dirty man-meat dangling betwixt your legs!

The most important thing* my dear friend Cristina did today was determine that once we all lose our jobs and go running for our lives as they try to burn the building down with us still inside, we'll need to find a way to get paid for reenacting SNL sketches.

Mention of Cristina brings me to my second item--women that are funnier and more fascinating than me! If you glance to the right of these words, you will see a list of Good Reads. They are good. Some are primarily good for the pretty pictures they include, and some are good for the words they say. However, two are good because they are funny, smart, and written by people I know!

First up, my most devoted blog follower, Cristina. via TheFrankensteinHouse.com
According to Cristina's blog, she lives in Los Angeles, likes a serif font, and just bought a Frankenstein house. According to me, she is incredibly funny, zany to the max, has a brain that thinks about and articulates things in amazing ways, is also a lot like me, and just bought a Frankenstein house. What is a Frankenstein house, you ask? Well, read The Frankenstein House and you will understand.

The next very funny woman is Elizabeth Greenwood.via elizabethgreenwood.wordspress.com
She is many things I am not, not the least of which is fascinating. She's so fascinating she is world renowned for her interesting and exciting life. Because she is smart, hilarious, incredibly good looking, and has a miniature donk (i.e., a small scale donk, not a lack of donk), you will be tempted to hate her. But you can't! Although physical location and the passage of time have distanced us since our days sunning our bootydos in Mexico, luckily I have the pleasure of reading her page and freelance work. You should too!

I wish I had a good way to end this, but I've got Juan Gabriel blaring through the boo's laptop speakers and he fancies himself one of Juan's background singers. Juan Gabriel doesn't HAVE background singers! He doesn't need them. Everybody knows that.

*Cristina may have actually accomplished something of value for the American taxpayers today, unlike me.

1 comment:

  1. white baby tigers are notorious office sluts. i'm glad the internets are finally picking up on this.


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